The Immortal Gazette: The Mischief of Loki, Alice, and Rumplestiltskin – The Tale of The Greek Gods
The Immortal Gazette studio hummed with the usual magic, the air thick with stories waiting to be told. Alice, perched atop her chair with a mischievous glint in her eye, was swirling her tea, her lips twitching into a smile as Loki paced in circles, his fingers drumming against his chin. Rumplestiltskin was already rubbing his hands together, no doubt about to spin some twisted tale of the gods.
"So, gods, huh?" Alice started, tilting her head back slightly, eyes narrowing in mock thought. "Greek gods, to be precise. You know, the ones who absolutely never got enough attention from their mortal worshippers, so they just had to cause some drama to feel important."
Loki, ever the expert in mischief, grinned devilishly. "Drama? I’d call it performance art," he said, flicking a bit of imaginary dust off his sleeve. "The Greek gods had style. They were the OG celebrities, throwing tantrums, seducing mortals, creating chaos. It’s practically a textbook for how to make a name for yourself."
Alice snorted. "Oh, sure. I mean, who wouldn’t want to be the god of the sky or the sea? ‘Oh, I’m Zeus, and I can control the weather, and look at me, I’m so important.’ But somehow, it always ends in a ridiculous mess. How many of Zeus’s affairs ended in, let’s see... giant monsters, floods, or curses? Spoiler: a lot."
Rumplestiltskin, who was sitting cross-legged and flipping through a dusty scroll, glanced up with a knowing smirk. "Ah, but you’re missing the point, Alice. The gods weren’t just about drama for drama’s sake. There was a method to their madness. They ruled over mortal lives, shaping destinies like puppeteers with their strings. But even they, with all their divine power, couldn’t escape their own flaws. Take Zeus, for example—father of the gods, ruler of the heavens. Sure, he could zap anyone with a lightning bolt, but when it came to handling relationships or his own family? Disaster."
Alice raised her teacup. "Yeah, but that's because Zeus had no self-control," she said, her voice dripping with sarcasm. "I mean, what kind of god can't keep it in his pants for five minutes? He could’ve been a master of subtlety—imagine what would’ve happened if Zeus had a little more finesse. But no. Instead, he’d just show up in the form of a golden shower or a swan. Real classy, Zeus."
Loki let out a short laugh, shaking his head. "A swan? That’s one way to wing it, I guess." He rubbed his hands together, the familiar glint of mischief in his eyes. "But hey, let’s not forget about Hera, his wife. Queen of the gods, as she liked to remind everyone. And yet, she was the most obsessive of them all. She couldn’t handle Zeus’s little affairs without turning it into a blood feud. Literally. There’s no subtlety in that woman’s world—only vengeance. If I were Zeus, I would’ve run from her wrath."
Rumplestiltskin let out a soft chuckle, his fingers tapping rhythmically against his knee. "Ah, but that was the beauty of their dynamics. Hera’s anger made the mortals fear her. And in their eyes, Zeus’s power was amplified by Hera’s fury. Together, they were an unstoppable force, their petty squabbles just a play for the mortals to witness. But you’re right, Alice—the irony was rich. The king of the gods couldn’t keep his house in order. And that’s where the trouble started."
Alice leaned forward, her eyes dancing with amusement. "And then you’ve got the whole pantheon of gods, all just as messed up as Zeus. Poseidon—really? The god of the seas, and yet he can’t seem to keep a calm anything. I mean, why was he always angry? Sea storms, tsunamis, earthquakes—all because he didn’t get enough attention? Ugh, give me a break."
"That’s just it," Loki interjected, his voice laced with mock sympathy. "All of them were petty. Athena, the goddess of wisdom, could’ve used a bit of common sense. Ares, god of war—what else would you expect from a guy who’s always up for a fight? And don’t get me started on Apollo—oh, look at me, I’m the god of the sun, so I’m perfect... until I accidentally kill someone with a dart. Honestly, I think I could’ve done better than most of them."
Alice chuckled, raising her brows. "Apollo, yeah. Always overestimating himself. They all had a big problem with that—thinking they were above it all just because they could control a little weather, or a flood, or the underworld. As if that somehow made them untouchable." She took a dramatic sip of her tea. "That’s the thing about gods, Loki. They think they can’t be touched, but give them a few thousand years and—poof—they’re all dust and broken temples."
Rumplestiltskin smiled knowingly. "Exactly. Their fatal flaw—they never learned how to handle their power. They ruled with force, not wisdom. They demanded worship, but in the end, they couldn’t even control themselves. That’s why mortals eventually turned their backs on them. They realized the gods were just as flawed as they were. More so, even."
Loki gave an exaggerated sigh. "It’s tragic, really. They had everything, and still managed to mess it all up. The worst part is, they still think they’re relevant. Talk about living in denial."
Alice rolled her eyes, leaning back in her chair with a smirk. "Well, I suppose I should be grateful that I’m not stuck in some divine drama, ruling over petty squabbles for eternity. Although, let’s face it, if I were one of the Greek gods, I’d probably be the only one who knew how to handle it. A little bit of chaos, a little bit of cleverness, and bam, no more problems. I’d have them all dancing on my strings."
Rumplestiltskin tapped his chin thoughtfully. "Now that’s a story worth telling. Alice, goddess of absolute control, managing the pantheon with nothing but wit and charm." He gave her a knowing wink.
Loki, never one to resist a challenge, raised an eyebrow. "I’d say you’d be the most dangerous goddess, Alice. You’d make Zeus look like a puppet in your hands."
Alice grinned, her eyes glinting with a wicked sparkle. "Oh, I’d make them all look like fools. And you, Loki, would probably be my right-hand trickster—for once, playing second fiddle."
Loki smirked. "Oh, please. I’d still be the one who pulls the strings behind the scenes. You’d be the face of the operation, but I’d be the one stirring the pot."
Alice laughed, leaning back in her chair as the air around them buzzed with the echoes of mischief. "Well, then, we’d make a great team. A little bit of divine chaos, a dash of control, and a whole lot of unpredictable fun. I’m sure the mortals would love that story."
And with that, the trio of immortals leaned back in their chairs, content in their ability to bend the very stories of the gods to their whims. Perhaps, just perhaps, they’d rewrite history for a new generation. But only if the mortals were lucky enough to hear it.
🖋️✨📜🖤
