The Immortal Gazette: Tales of the Immortal, Bluebeard's Curse (Live from the Immortal Gazette Studio) 📖
The Immortal Gazette studio buzzes with an electric, dark energy as the trio of immortals—Alice, Rumplestiltskin, and Loki—sit around a large, mahogany table. Dim, amber lights cast eerie shadows over the room, and the air feels thick with anticipation. The laughter of Alice echoes lightly through the studio as she leans back in her velvet chair, swirling her teacup, her eyes gleaming mischievously. Loki taps his fingers together, a smile creeping across his face as he watches the others. And Rumplestiltskin? Well, he's all too ready to dive into trouble.
Alice (sweetly): Well, darlings, today we get to talk about a real charmer—Bluebeard. You’ve heard of him, right? Mysterious man, secretive as can be, and—surprise, surprise—he’s married more times than I can count. And guess what? He’s got one little rule for his new wives. A single rule. Don’t go into a specific room. Just one room. How very ominous, don’t you think?
Rumplestiltskin (with a devilish grin): Oh, please. Don’t get me started. It’s basically a red flag with a capital R. Tell me, Alice—what kind of guy locks away a room and says, “Don’t open it, or else”? That's basically asking for trouble. You can’t make something forbidden and not expect people to be curious. It’s like a dare wrapped in a mystery... and this poor wife? She couldn’t resist.
Loki (grinning mischievously): Mmm, Bluebeard’s little game is classic! He practically hands them a reason to break the rule. "Don’t open it." Pfft, like that ever works. Who wouldn't be itching to know what's behind that door? (He smirks.) I mean, he had it coming. And when the wife finally opens that door? Let's just say... she doesn’t find a garden of roses, if you catch my drift. Definitely not the stuff of fairy tales.
Alice (laughing softly, swishing her teacup): Oh, darling, you won’t believe what she found! Blood. Corpses. Heads on the floor. It’s a real family collection—except not the kind you’d hang on the wall. But this poor woman, she tries to clean it all up before Bluebeard finds out. Nice try, sweetheart. He knows. He always knows. And when he catches her? Oh, the end is swift and brutal. No mercy from him.
Rumplestiltskin (leaning forward with a grin): But then comes the fun part—revenge, my friends. Oh, it’s sweet. The wife’s brothers come to the rescue, all guns blazing. Well, swords, technically. They chop Bluebeard into bits. Revenge never tasted so good, does it? It’s the ultimate payback for all the little secrets he tried to hide.
Loki (chuckling under his breath): Ahh, revenge. A dish best served bloody. But honestly? Bluebeard had no business making that room off-limits. If you’re going to be that dramatic, you better expect someone to crack the code. Maybe he should’ve had a “Welcome” sign on the door instead. Honestly, that’s what happens when you’re too secretive. People want to know. That’s how you end up with a bloody mess. Or worse... you end up dead. (He winks.)
Alice (playfully): Let’s be real, Loki—if Bluebeard had been more honest, maybe his wives wouldn’t have opened that door. But where’s the fun in that, hmm? I say, let the curiosity reign. Every good tale needs a bit of scandal. And Bluebeard? He’s scandal with a capital S. And in the end, he got what was coming to him.
Rumplestiltskin (with a sly chuckle): Of course, that’s the beauty of it all. He thought he could control his wives, make them follow his rules. But when you play the game like that, someone’s going to crack. And when they do, it’s never as pretty as you think. Bluebeard had a whole mansion full of secrets, but the real question is: who’s the bigger fool? The one who hides them, or the one who finds them?
Loki (leaning back in his chair, grinning): So, what’s the verdict? Is Bluebeard just another tragic figure, a victim of his own hubris? Or is he a master manipulator who got exactly what he deserved? Either way, it’s a tale as old as time: secrets, lies, and bloody consequences. A little too much drama for the kids, though, don’t you think?
Alice (smirking, raising an eyebrow): Oh, absolutely. No bedtime stories here, darling. Unless you want nightmares instead of sweet dreams. Bluebeard’s tale? That’s for those who like their stories... a bit on the darker side. For the kiddos, though? Keep them away from locked rooms and men with too many secrets.
The Verdict: Bluebeard is the perfect example of a tragic villain who thinks he can outsmart everyone around him. But, as we all know, curiosity always wins. His dark tale isn’t for the faint of heart, but it certainly is for those who enjoy a good revenge-fueled ending. Just don’t let the little ones hear it—or they might start locking all their doors and questioning everything.
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